September 20, 2008
Today was Similkameen Sizzle, the annual pepper harvest festival in Keremeos. We didn't attend, because I worked at OK Falls Day in Okanagan Falls. This morning I drove to Okanagan Falls, to the home of my "employer", Lisa. She was putting the finishing touches on the face make-up of two clowns she was sending to Similkameen Sizzle. When she finished with them we headed for the baseball field on the edge of Okanagan Falls which was the OK Falls Day Parade marshalling grounds. Lisa worked on preparing face make-up for about a dozen children that were part of the Tickleberry entry in the parade. Her husband Dean worked on the pirate ship float that their company Clownin' Around was providing for the parade. I worked on getting into the Tickleberry Bear costume.
Tickleberry's is an Okanagan Falls ice cream / chocolate / souvenir / tourism business. Their mascot is a bear. Today I was the Tickleberry Bear ! Brutally hot, exhausting work ! First I put on a contraption that was like a giant diaper with suspender straps, and 3 large hoops around my body to make it big. Then came the overalls. Then the wool shirt. Did I mention that it was sunny and warm today ? ! ? Then the big fuzzy feet. Then the big fuzzy hands. Then ... the giant, fuzzy bear head. I was supposed to walk in the parade handing out Tickleberry coupons.
But ... the eye holes in the giant, fuzzy bear head were about the size of loonies ( Canadian dollar coins ). And they were about 18 inches in front of my eyes. Severe tunnel vision ! ! ! The closest I could see the ground was about 50 feet in front of me. And the big, fuzzy, four fingered hands made it impossible to handle coupons. I had to recruit the assistance of two of Lisa's clowns that were walking in the parade. One to hand out coupons. The other one to walk beside me and be my "seeing eye clown". HA HA HA !
WHEW ! ! ! HOT, HOT, HOT ! ! ! The parade wound its way around and through Okanagan Falls, about 45 minutes of walking. At the end of the parade I was relieved to be able to pull off the giant, fuzzy bear head and get some fresh air. The inside of the bear head was soaked. My hair and face were soaked. My body, my clothes, and the entire bear costume were soaked. And then ... Lisa advised me that I was to wander around the main park of Okanagan Falls, where all the activities were taking place, for another 45 minutes < sigh >. My seeing eye clown escorted me to the park, then left me to wander around. I moved very slowly, shuffling my feet to avoid tripping over anything. And frequently, when I would feel something impact against my legs, I would carefully drop to my knees. It would be another four to six year old wanting a "bear hug". And parents wanting a photo of their child being hugged by the big bear. I must have hugged every kid from Kelowna to Keremeos ! ! !
Finally ... my time as Tickleberry Bear was over ! Lisa's daughter, about twelve years old, escorted me back to their home where I could finally pull off my bear head. She thought the bear head was "cool" and asked if she could put it on. Sure ! She wasn't even quite finished putting it on when she yanked it off, screaming "YUCK ... it's soaking wet in there". Well ... YEAH !
I got out of my dripping wet bear costume, and rested on the tailgate of my truck for a few minutes, cooling off, drying off, and munching on part of a picnic lunch Joanne had prepared for me. And then it was time for part two of my day. I put on my magician's cape and top hat, stuffed my pockets full of magic, and spent the next 2½ hours wandering around the park performing magic. It went well. But ... HA HA HA ... I was amazed at how often I would perform a magic trick, and a ten to twelve year old boy would say "oh, I know how that's done". I would hand them the disappearing / reappearing silk scarf, or the three ropes that change lengths, or the rope with the disappearing knot. Inevitably, they would fumble around with it for awhile, then sheepishly hand it back to me. HA HA HA ... that's why I'm a magician, kid, and you're not !
My biggest chuckle of the day ( to myself ) was when I made a silk scarf disappear for a couple of children, then reached over behind their mother's left ear to "pull it out of her ear". She yanked away, shrieking "don't touch me". You skank ! Your tits are hanging out for all of Okanagan Falls to see, but you don't want a magician to reach over to the side of your head to "pull a scarf out of your ear" for the amusement of your children !
DSK